Maintaining a Positive Mindset
When things are going good, we feel good. When we get that A on that big exam, we're excited, or when we find $100 on the floor, dopamine is flooding our brain in both scenarios. Those things are all great, and I'm sure a lot of you reading this can relate, but what happens when things aren't going so well? Things have been slow. You failed that big exam. You lost $100 you couldn't afford to lose. Happiness and positivity are out of the question now. Why is that?
Life happens, thats why. In life we are swayed by our emotional energy. It is all too easy to find ourselves falling victim to our circumstances. The outside forces that impact our lives burden us. These circumstances that negatively impact us fog our minds and cloud our judgment. We let what happens to us create a false reality of our lives. We then take these false realities and formulate them into habits. Each time a similar circumstance comes along, we automatically associate it with that negative and false reality. This behavior becomes so innate we feel it is normal and a part of our character.
My question for you is, does it have to be this way?
What if I told you there was a better way? A concept that may not cure our "negative" circumstances, but rather one that shifts our perspective of them.
I call this concept "The Positive Mind Complex™". This is a method that wires the mind to maintain a positive outlook despite the negative circumstance(s) we face. Something to keep in mind is that regardless of what we go through, we always have a choice. We choose whether or not we want to be happy, or consumed by negativity. This complex is the deliberate application of forced positivity. Yes, forced positivity. This is a method I use on a daily basis. This might sound cliché but it is a method that truly needs to be mastered in order to reap the benefits.
Some examples of how I apply this to my life:
Scenario 1: I'm in the left lane on I-95 (major highway in Florida). It is a lane used for both passing and cars going slightly above the speed limit. Any Floridian can vouch for me when I say that cars that get in the left lane to go 40mph in a 70mph speed zone are incredibly irritating.
Typically it is standard to road rage, yell, and think of horrible things in regard to the situation. It is almost instinctive for people to become agitated at this situation. We change lanes, speed pass the individual to prove a point, but at what cost? You risk getting in an accident, raising your blood pressure, becoming blinded by anger, all for what? A car going slow.
Instead of raging at this situation, I shift my thinking. Some funny things I tell myself to calm down are "It's probably a little grandma/grandpa who doesn't know any better", or "this person doesn't realize they're pissing everyone off, but they don't care." Both cases are usually true. Why get worked up when 9/10 the person causing the agitation could care less or doesn't know any better? It's just not worth getting riled up.
Scenario 2: My closest friend goes out without me and/or leaves me out of something.
Everyone's natural instinct is to get upset and call that person fake. The world ends for many when their friends do this to them, I know this because I was that person at one point. Here's a concept and a way to shift your thinking: "This person isn't obligated to hang out with me every time. It would've been nice to be thought of, but at least they had fun. I need to learn to hangout with myself more so I'm not dependent on others." See the shift? You go from a "why me" mentality to an "oh, well" mentality. No need to get worked up or think your closest friend is a snake, they just aren't obligated to be with you 24/7 so there's no real harm.
Scenario 3 (My favorite): Life isn't going my way. Everything seems to be falling apart. Why do bad things happen to good people? I'm over it...
This is my favorite scenario because I've done this religiously for years. This is a situation where every negative thing we feel hits us all at once and we tend to let it suck the life out of us. We become easily offended, irritated, saddened, unmotivated, and lost. When experiencing this scenario we feel all is lost and we look to blame everything in sight, including that person in the mirror. We just lose hope all together during these times.
So how does one pull themselves out of these dark moments? Here's how I go about it:
1. I remind myself that it's not that serious. No matter what I go through, I know that I'm adding to my own grief by thinking negatively
2. When I feel like I've hit rock bottom I know I can only go up
3. There's more to this world than myself. I'm whining about walking to class in the heat while a lot of kids are dying to walk miles to go to school in other places
4. If something is out of my control, I won't try to control it. I move on
5. Find the positives in the situation. Sure life gets hard, but I'd rather push through than stay in the same place
6. Don't just go through it, grow through it
7. Think: "What am I supposed to learn from this situation?"
8. I'm greater than my circumstances
9. I simply choose to not stress
10. "It is what it is"
11. Harness the energy from the little moments that make you happy
12. I love a good challenge
13. Self affirmations:
-I am great
-Life is Great
-I feel good
-It's going to be a blessed/great day
-Another day, another opportunity
Or my social media favorite: I WILL GREET THIS DAY WITH LOVE IN MY HEART.
Pretty soon these things become innate and a habit. I find myself having "bad days" yet people ask me how I'm doing and I automatically respond "excellent," regardless of my circumstances.
Do these little things I'm sharing with you. It may not seem like much but I promise it goes a long way. By doing these things with great intention you subconsciously become flooded with positivity. You'll carry yourself differently. You'll have more great days than bad ones.
Many people will brush this advice off which is fine, but for those who know they need this, I encourage you to try this for 30 days. Whenever you find yourself becoming negative, drown it with positivity the best you can.
Note: You aren't faking happiness, you're teaching your mind to maintain its cool no matter the situation.
Plant seeds of positivity in the rich lands of your mind. You know what they say, "as you sow, so shall you reap," so make sure you're reaping a lot of the good stuff!
-Vlad
